Balance in Bites

Ok ummmm HUGE RECAP TIME:

Saturday (more than a week ago): Pete and I went to go see a local Boston band at a club downtown. It was a lot of fun, but it triggered some bad eating/drinking habits. We decided at the last minute to go, I proceeded to drink too much wine (pre-gaming is so 2004. What was I thinking), and snack on food that I didn’t really need. Oh, and eat some of Pete’s chinese food that he ordered before we left. Mmmmm. Lo mein. >.< I had a couple beers at the bar too, and I even went and bummed a cigarette from someone outside. Reeeeal classy. Thankfully I was smart enough to stop drinking alcohol and start drinking water halfway through the night.

Sunday: Saturday night was fun, but for some reason, the next day I was utterly and completely depressed. It was awful. I had digressed back to those college days when I was practically a zombie due to depression (even though my doctor had, at the time, bumped my Zoloft dose up to the highest that she could in good conscience). I never, ever, ever want to go back to how I felt back then. Ever. And on Sunday, it’s how I felt.

I kind of panicked. I didn’t want to feel like this! Why do I feel like this?? Shit! I tried to calm down. Tomorrow will be better, I told myself. Just tough it out til tomorrow. Yeah, you feel like curling up in bed and sleeping forever, but tomorrow will be better, you just have to ride it out.

Monday: “Tomorrow” WASN’T better. I woke up on Monday morning with the intention of having a healthy breakfast, taking a shower, checking the weather, and instead, didn’t get out of bed for about forty minutes. Eventually I *did* get out of bed (hey, improvement! When I was depressed in college, I actually wouldn’t get out of bed. I’d have class, and I would just…. lay in bed. And skip class. Because I was too depressed to face the world. Yeah), and I certainly made it to work on time and all, but Monday was just fucking awful. I didn’t even stop for coffee in the morning because I didn’t want to interact with the barista. That’s pretty bad.

I told myself I should go out for a run after work. That I should eat healthy. “These things will help!” I told myself. But I couldn’t get out the door. I couldn’t motivate myself to eat right. I just felt like…. well, shit.

Tuesday: I felt better (THANK GOD). Still didn’t run, though. Boooo. Packed everything for Thanksgiving, because I was going home the next day.

Wednesday – Today: It’s late, so I’m going to recap the actual holiday tomorrow. But I had a really wonderful Thanksgiving with my family. I felt a MILLION times better than the past few days early in the week. And I ran with my mom all three days that I was home! It helped me get back into the running groove. And eating-wise, I did great. I didn’t count points, and I did indulge, but I didn’t overeat or feel out of control at all. More on this tomorrow. Also, more on the ED clinic tomorrow, too!

Hope you all had a safe, happy holiday. And thank you for the wonderful comments on my last post, and for letting me take a bit of a blogging break for the past week. =P